Friday cats
Pictures March 20th, 2009
Bush government Vs. Obama government
Pictures March 17th, 2009
WENG WENG RAP
Video March 16th, 2009
Have a nice weekend!
Pictures March 14th, 2009
Secret sex positions
Jokes March 14th, 2009
The Teabagging – The all time classic maneuver of tapping your cock on a chick’s forehead whilst she is sucking on your balls, and uttering the timeless phrase — “Who’s Your daddy?”
The Houdini – Going at it doggie style until you are just about to cum, then pull out and spit on her back so she thinks that you have. When she turns around a blast is unleashed into her face and she is left shocked and amazed, wondering how you managed it.
The Angry Dragon – Immediately after you blow your load in a girl’s mouth, smack the back of her head and make it come out her nose. When she gets up, she’ll look like an angry dragon.
Cum Guzzling Sperm Burping Bitch – The once in a lifetime act of blowing a hot steamy load down the back of a girl’s throat and then proceeding to give her a large cold bottle of your favorite carbonated drink, making her guzzle it down. Then, shake her head vigorously back and forth to create the Cum Guzzling, Sperm Burping effect. A great way to impress your friends.
Dirty Sanchez – A time honored event in which while laying the bone doggie style, you insert your finger into her asshole. You then pull it out and wipe it across her upper lip, leaving a thin shit mustache. This makes her look like someone whose name is Dirty Sanchez.
The Donkey Punch – Banging a girl doggie style and then moments before you cum, you stick your dick in her ass and then punch her in the back of the neck. The blow to the neck will stun the muscles in the female’s ass, which will constrict the penis and give you a tremendous orgasmic experience when you ejaculate.
The Flaming Amazon – This one’s for all you pyromaniacs out there. When you’re screwing some chick, right when your about to cum, pull out and quickly grab the nearest lighter and set her pubes on fire, then…extinguish the flames with your jizz!
The Flying Camel – A personal favorite. As she is lying on her back and you are hammering her on your knees, you very carefully move forward and prop yourself (without using your arms) on your dick while it is still inserted in her vertical seafood taco. You then proceed to flap your arms and let out a long shrieking howl, much like a flying camel. Strictly a classy move.
The Screwnicorn – When a dyke puts her strap-on dildo on her forehead and proceeds to go at her partner like a crazed unicorn.
The Zombie Mask – While getting head from your favorite, unsuspecting, trash-barrel whore, tell her you want her to look right up at you with those “pretty little eyes” when you blow your load. Then, just when you’re ready to spew a good weeks worth of goo, blast that hefty load in both eyes. This temporary state of blindness will produce the zombie effect as she stumbles around the room with arms outstretched, and moaning like the walking dead.
Deep Sea Penetration:
Have your partner stand firmly, feet shoulder width apart, and envelope them with your tentacles from behind. Bending at the knees, slide yourself (or a strap-on) inside and hang-on to your partner’s shoulders or hips. If you have trouble balancing, have your partner face the wall and put their hands on it. Or, modify the position slightly and have them bend over with their hands on a table or dresser. If you’re lacking in the tentacle department, a raging hard-on will have to suffice. Remember to experiment, a sex position is just a starting point! Thrust gently, violently, or explore with toys… and why stand against a boring bedroom wall when this position works fabulously in the shower!
Ride ‘em Cowboy: Read the rest of this entry »
Tags: Secret, sex positions
Things NOT to do at a job interview.
Jokes March 13th, 2009
According to several sites on the net, personnel executives of 100 major American corporations were asked for stories of unusual behavior by job applicants:
Quote:
* Said he was so well qualified [that] if he didn’t get the job, it would prove that the company’s management was incompetent.* Stretched out on the floor to fill out the job application.
* Brought her large dog to the interview.
* Chewed bubble gum and constantly blew bubbles.
* Candidate kept giggling through serious interview.
* She wore a Walkman and said she could listen to the music and me at the same time.
* Balding candidate abruptly excused himself. Returned to office a few minutes later wearing a hairpiece.
* Applicant challenged interviewer to arm wrestle.
* Asked to see interviewer’s resume to see if the personnel executive was qualified to judge the candidate.
* Announced she hadn’t had lunch and proceeded to eat a hamburger and French fries in the interviewer’s office.
* Without saying a word, candidate stood up and walked out during the middle of the interview.
* Man wore jogging suit to interview for position as financial vice president.
* Said if he were hired, he would demonstrate his loyalty by having the corporate logo tattooed on his forearm.
* Interrupted to phone his therapist for advice on answering specific interview questions.
* Wouldn’t get out of the chair until I would hire him. I had to call the police.
* When I asked him about his hobbies, he stood up and started tap dancing around my office.
* Had a little pinball game and challenged me to play with him. Read the rest of this entry »
Tags: job interview
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