Special horse
Jokes January 31st, 2009
There’s this guy who had been lost and walking in the desert for about 2 weeks.
One hot day, he sees the home of a missionary. Tired and weak, he crawls up to the house and collapses on the doorstep.
The missionary finds him and nurses him back to health. Feeling better, the man asks the missionary for directions to the nearest town.
On his way out the backdoor, he sees this horse. He goes back into the house and asks the missionary, “Could I borrow your horse and give it back when I reach the town?”
The missionary says, “Sure but there is a special thing about this horse. You have to say ‘Thank God’ to make it go and ‘Amen’ to make it stop.”
Not paying much attention, the man says, “Sure, ok.”
So he gets On the horse and says, “Thank God” and the horse starts walking.
Then he says, “Thank God, thank God, ” and the horse starts trotting. Feeling really brave, the man say, “Thank God, thank God, thank God, thank God, thank God” and the horse just takes off.
Pretty soon he sees this cliff coming up and he’s doing everything he can to make the horse stop. “Whoa, stop, hold on!!!!” Finally he remembers, “Amen!!”
The horse stops 4 inches from the cliff. The man leans back in the saddle and says, “Thank God”. 
Talk like a frog
Jokes January 30th, 2009
A little boy turned to his grandpa and said, “grandpa, talk like a frog.”
The Grandpa replied “What?, I’m not going to talk like a frog!”
The little boy again asked, “come on, Grandpa talk like a frog please.”
Grandpa again said “No! Go bother your grandmother.”
The little boy finally gave up and left.
A little while later the little boy’s sister came in and said “Grandpa will you talk like a frog for me?”
Grandpa of course replied, “NO!”
The little girl then said “Please grandpa will you talk just like a frog”?
Grandpa was very disturbed by now and said, “what is it with you and your brother, why in the world do you want me to talk like a frog?”
The little girl looked at her grandpa and said “Well last night daddy told us that when you croak we are going to go to Disney World.”
Tags: fun
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“Hello?”
“Hi honey, this is Daddy, Is Mommy near the phone?”
“No Daddy, She’s upstairs in the bedroom with Uncle Paul”
After a brief pause, Daddy says, “But honey, you haven’t got an Uncle Paul.”
“Oh yes I do and he’s upstairs in the room with Mommy, right now”
……. Brief Pause
“Uh, okay then, this is what I want you to do. Put the phone down on the table, run upstairs and knock on the bedroom door, and shout to Mommy that Daddy’s car just pulled into the driveway”
“Okay Daddy, just a minute”
A few minutes later the little girl comes back to the phone.
“I did it Daddy”
“And what happened honey?” he asked
“Well, Mommy got all scared, jumped out of bed with no clothes on and ran around screaming. Then she tripped over the rug, hit her head on the dresser and now she isn’t moving at all!”
“Oh my God!!! What about your Uncle Paul?”
“He jumped out of the bed with no clothes on too. He was all scared and he jumped out of the back window and into the swimming pool. But I guess he didn’t know that you took out the water last week to clean it. He hit the bottom of the pool and he’s not moving either”
***Long Pause***
****Longer Pause****
“Swimming pool?? …… Is this 0208 257 9213?”
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